The Quiet Alchemy of Connection

Imagine you’re staring at a pen full of identical golden retrievers—each as adorable as the other—and you have to pick one to take home. Even if each puppy grows into a different dog, physically or emotionally, it will be just as rewarding to grow with and love any one of them. It will be just as magical going through life with a shy, reserved dog as it will be with an energetic one. So then, how do you decide which one out of the pen is going to be your best buddy? How do you choose your magic?

Whether it’s for a puppy or a best friend, it seems that humans are programmed to love. It’s strange—you might think that love comes naturally only with certain people, but isn’t it strikingly easy to love anyone when you want to? Right here, right now, look at the people around you (it doesn’t matter if they’re complete strangers or family): I bet you can find at least two things about these people that you like or adore. These could potentially be the things that make you want to approach them or the things you remember about them even if, or when, your relationship with them grows.

Isn’t it easy to love? I often look at my friends with loving, puppy eyes, wondering how I ended up with this crazy lot. I could’ve picked anyone to sit with on that first day of school, but luckily I sat at their table, and, well, the rest is history. I can still see myself being happy, however, if I had picked the table next to theirs and the people sitting there ended up as my best friends instead of acquaintances—I could have just as easily grown with them, for I can name at least ten things I adore about that lot. I could have just as easily chosen that magic—or some other.

And thus arises the question: How do I choose my magic? How have I chosen the magical people in my life before? No one knows. There are too many factors that could influence decisions in situations which essentially alter the trajectory of life, so there really isn’t a way to determine how we humans do this. But I don’t think that means it’s a completely random decision; there’s an algorithm to every ‘random.’

So, is it simply that fate is written and we don’t consciously influence anything ever? Possibly, but I think such a conclusion undermines the power of the mind and the heart. While in some other timeline maybe everything that is to come has already happened and everything you will ever do, therefore, is known, it is still you who is making decisions, you who is choosing your magic today. Maybe you’re getting lucky, or maybe it is fate that all the episodes of life leave you with the perfect side characters. Just know, no matter what, it is your show, and it’s a good one. No matter what today’s episode is like, it all works out in the end.

So, do you simply choose the puppy that ran to you first, or do you pick the one that seems like the quietest of the lot? Or some other? Do you let life come at you, or do you realise that it comes from you?